Never Give Up, Always Move Forward

Never Give Up, Always Move Forward

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Everything Happens For A Reason: 33 Things Totally Free

Everything Happens For A Reason: 33 Things Totally Free: I often think, those things which we enjoy the most, truly appreciate the most (and sometimes to forget to appreciate the most) are actuall...

33 Things Totally Free

I often think, those things which we enjoy the most, truly appreciate the most (and sometimes to forget to appreciate the most) are actually free.

1.  The way you make someone feel.

2.  The moment you realize, you are not as alone as you think you are.

3.  When someone loves you at your most unlovable times.

4.  The smile on your child's face, like a moonbeam.

5.  The moment, after it's gone, and not regretting it.

6.  Affecting people without realizing it.

7.  Hope.  Hope.  Hope.

8.  Faith.  Restoring someone's Faith.

9.  Waking up to have another day and another chance to get it right.

10.  A second chance (at anything).

11.  A hug and being hugged tight.

12.  A text, phone call or message of love.

13.  Being missed by someone.

14.  That the sun comes up in the morning without fail as does the moon.

15.  Tolerance.

16.  Comfortable silences amongst those you love.

17.  Butterflies - seen or felt.

18.  Holding a hand.

19.  Trust.

20.  When someone warms your car up in below zero temps.

21.  Having the courage to think for yourself.

22.  Forgiving yourself or someone.

23. If you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only love -understanding the Paradox (Mother Teresa).

24. The heat of the sun on your bare skin.

25.  Helping someone else find a piece of Joy in their life.

26.  Just being there when you are needed.

27.  The way the words "I love you Mommie" sound as they tumble off of my daughter's lips..

28.  Saying what you mean, and meaning what you say....

29.  Random acts of kindness.

30.  Not holding back.

31.  Your time.  Your time when you are busy.

32.  Listening.

33.  The sound of someone's familiar voice.

Saturday, December 27, 2014

A second chance

It is hard to be, the person you want me to be
I am eternally grateful you see
that you have chosen me

So, I've let go of the past and set it free
It holds only the best memories
A time and space in my life that was real for me
Definitely not a thing meant to be

There is something sweet about your persistence to be a "we"
That is to say, a you and me
I'm not used to that kind of freedom to be
A part of someone proud to be with me
The past so hard on my self esteem

In spite of that, you have been there for me
Calling you and me a "we" way before it was agreeable to me

So, I hope that you choose to try on for size
A courtship with me that is not built on demise
But rather a friendship we try on for size

I thank you for being by my side
For understanding the trials of long distance
  And time you must bide
Before I could ever be someone's bride

I'm willing to try, you by my side
Until such a time when either should decide
That we were not meant to be by each other's side.

For now, I will try to be a good friend
As you seek so hard to be able to bend
To my silly feelings rooted in the past
Connected to a soul to which there was an end

My judgement was poor
But the lesson was rich
If you act like a bitch
You will never make him switch

With that I have learned to choose comfort over love
That was the message from way above
To keep our souls in heaven regardless of love

So now I am yours and we can sign our cards "we"
For there is no better place than with you sitting next to me.

Sunday, December 21, 2014

Everything Happens For A Reason: Love, Loved, Everyone Just Wants to Be Loved

Everything Happens For A Reason: Love, Loved, Everyone Just Wants to Be Loved: Before you can grow up, you must fall in love three times.  Once you must fall in love with your best friend, ruining your friendship ...

Love, Loved, Everyone Just Wants to Be Loved


Before you can grow up, you must fall in love three times.  Once you must fall in love with your best friend, ruining your friendship forever, quite possibly.  This will teach you who your true friends are and the fine line between friendship and more.  Once you must fall in love with someone you believe to be perfect and that you should never be treated as any less than you deserve.  And once you must fall in love with someone exactly like you.  To teach you who you are and who you want to be.  Once you have lived through all of that, you learn that the people who care about you most are the ones that you hurt and the ones you hurt are the ones you needed the most.  Most of all, you start to learn that love is only a concept and not something that can be defined.  It is different to each person and the sum total of their experiences. You learn to understand that everyone only just wants to be loved.

Aside from the pain, suffering and hard choices you have to find the things you love and run to them.  That which does not kill you makes you stronger?  I really don't think so.  I think strength comes from the good things and the people in your life who are always there.  These things, you hold onto when your spirit is broken, when your'e hurt, when you're not the most lovable.

Like most sensitive souls, you already know you are sensitive.  You soak up the moods of those you care for like a sponge.  There's nothing wrong with being sensitive.  Truth is, most times I feel too much, every word, every action and every energy often goes straight to my heart.  I often wear it.

Who has time for casual love?   I prefer the fierce kind, where your heart is on display and everything you have is handed over in passion like a gift, hoping that the gift is unwrapped gently. If you have to wonder if you have passion, cross the word wonder out and it simply becomes a question, not an answer.

Truth is, the more intimately you know someone, regardless of who, the more clearly you see their flaws. That's just how it's meant to be, you know.  You get to see just how flawed we all really are when you're sick, tired, frustrated, mad, hurt or broken or under pressure.  In those moments, you know you still love when things are ugly.  Love is patient.  Love is kind.  Love is deliberate.  Love is hard.  Love is pain and sometimes sacrifice.  It's seeing the darkness in another and refusing budge.

I don't pretend to know what love is for everyone, but I can tell you what is is to me.  It comes from trusting them to know all of these things that make you, you.  Often beautiful, sometimes not and including the things you may be ashamed of.  It's feeling comfortable and safe, and still feeling weak in the knees when you're in the same room.  It's about trust and respect.  It doesn't matter who it is when we speak of love, it matters simply that we love.  Isn't that what life is all about?  Doing all things in love?










Saturday, December 20, 2014

Letting Go of Crappy

Some relationships are incredibly pernicious. We often develop relationships out of convenience, without considering the traits necessary to build a successful bond with another person—important traits like unwavering support and shared trust and loving encouragement.
When a relationship is birthed out of convenience it is bound to fail. We need more than a person’s physical presence to maintain a meaningful connection, but we routinely keep people around because … well, simply because they’re already around.
It’s easy to develop a connection with someone who’s always there and we don't always choose our family members, coworkers.  Sometimes, it's not always a choice as to who will be in your life.  It takes work to keep any relationship going..your time, your care.  When the "core" of a relationship changes, no matter who it is, it is time to reevaluate. 
We’ve all held on to someone who didn’t deserve to be there for whatever reason.  The memories hurt, you wonder if it was real or if you convinced yourself it was real. Regardless, what is left is a box full of memories or a situation that occurred and you file it somewhere in the back of your soul, pieces of that memory slide out now and again and the pang or pain you feel in your gut is all too real.    
Sometimes, we hold people on a pedestal.  And we can't put people on a pedestal...because they don't belong there.  These people poop, burp, fart, have their good points and bad points just like every human.  Take the blinders off.  And if you remember, you probably thought most of these things were once endearing, cute or funny.
Fortunately, regardless of the situation - it may be fixable to a degree and maybe it's not. 
First, you can attempt to fix the relationship. This is obviously the preferable solution (albeit not always possible or worthwhile). People change over time, and so do relationships. You can change how your relationship works—be it marriage, friendship, or family—without completely ditching the relationship. 
Sit down with the person who’s draining the vitality from your life and explain to them what must change in order for your relationship to work. Explain that you need them to be more supportive, that you need them to participate in your growth, that they are important to you, but that you are important too.  Explain that you’re not attempting to change them as a person; you simply want to change how your relationship works.
Finally, ask them what they’d like to change about the relationship. Ask them how you can add more value. Listen attentively, act accordingly.
Or, if you’re unable to change the relationship, you can end it altogether. This is incredibly difficult, but it applies to any relationship: family, friends, lovers, coworkers, acquaintances. If someone is doing nothing but draining your life, it’s perfectly acceptable to tell them “This relationship is no longer right for me, so I must end it—I must move on.”  Remember, if they truly valued you, loved you, cared for you...well, you would know it.  People don't go around destroying what they love.
It’s OK to move on. You owe it to yourself to move on. You owe it to yourself to be happy with the relationships you have. You are in control.
Moving on is sometimes the only way to develop new, empowering relationships. Starting anew, empty-handed and full-hearted, you can build fresher, stronger, more supportive relationships—important relationships that allow you to have fun and be happy and contribute beyond yourself. These are the meaningful relationships we all need.
It’s also important to do your part. You too must add value to the relationship. Not value in the form of gifts or monetary value, but by showing up every day and rigorously exhibiting how much you care, demonstrating your love through consistent actions, continually going out of your way to help the other person grow.
You see, both people must do their part to grow the relationship. Only then will both of you be satisfied with the relationship you’ve built.

Black Tights and Leggings

Since the 1980s I have loved black tights.  With the re-emergence of leggings, well, need I say more? I'm certainly not a fashion expert, but these are a few of my favorite, favorite posts to sites relative to fashion.

Black Leggings with a white shirt.  Classic feel, classic look, takes you anywhere - wrap around a denim jacket and the look is complete. Hides all those imperfections in our butt, legs and thighs.

Black Sheer Tights  Great for that black business skirt and those days where meetings, interviews take place.  They have the sheerness of nylons and the comfort of black. Even when your'e cleaning the bathroom.

Black opaque nylons  Great with a skirt, boots, sweater dress..you name it, they provide the warmth of a legging and the comfort and ease of tights.  New this year are boot leg warmers, boot tights - and don't forget to grab a pair of the over the knee socks for added warmth at football games.

Black tights with Doc Martins and a pair of shorts..  Shorts?   That fashion sense dates back to the 80s for sure; however, yes, a pair of corduroy shorts in any color, black shorts, jean shorts...it all works with tights.

Black tights cover imperfections perfectly.  I love a pair of great jeans, but tights are dressy enough and casual enough to take their place effortlessly.
Black tights are great for lounging.  Need I say more.. yep..time for a pedicure STAT


Black Patterned Tights..  All over the place this year in knit, cable knit patterns, polka dot..you name it..they are available and I love them.

I don't own any at this time - photo courtesy of Victoria Chan...

So enjoy your winter months with a pair of black tights and black leggings..remember, they dress up any outfit and simply paired with a great pair of shoes, pumps, clogs, boots, Martins...you are all ready to get up and enjoy the holidays.

This is one of my girlfriend's - when we both wore ...black tights at a Thirty One Party...

And, of course, if black tights and leggings are not your thing..this comment is pretty appropriate

Saturday, September 13, 2014

Everything Happens For A Reason: LovePanky Reblog

Everything Happens For A Reason: LovePanky Reblog: Just in case you don't have time to look for juicy articles on the web, I did the homework and came up with this. Sleep well. Betwe...

LovePanky Reblog

Just in case you don't have time to look for juicy articles on the web, I did the homework and came up with this.

Sleep well.

Between the Sheets

Sunday, September 7, 2014

Everything Happens For A Reason: Dear Faith, Hope and Love:

Everything Happens For A Reason: Dear Faith, Hope and Love:: Dear Faith, Hope and Love: I don't think there are any three words in this world more undefined than you.  In fact, there are so many...

Dear Faith, Hope and Love:

Dear Faith, Hope and Love:

I don't think there are any three words in this world more undefined than you.  In fact, there are so many different definitions, opinions and thoughts to describe you that you become lost in our world of importance. Many have tried to define you from Merriam-Webster dictionary to the opinions of theologians and, yes, each and every one of us.  I know there are many who can quote chapter and verse from the Gospel, which I enjoy, but this letter is to Faith, Hope and Love.


Merriam-Webster describes Faith as a noun, which we know from grammar school is a person, place or thing.  The definition is:  Something that is believed, especially with strong conviction. (Merriam-Webster).   The dictionary citing also gives examples of faith, straightforward black and white, which I particularly enjoyed:

*Faith in Government has been badly shaken by recent scandals.
*She says that her faith has given her courage to deal with this tragedy.

These are definitions of how the word Faith is used in the English language, but takes us nowhere in really understanding who or what Faith is.

Most of the definitions of Faith in the history of Christian theology have followed biblical formulation in the Letter to the Hebrews (11:1):  the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. (Faith in Christianity).



Faith, hope and love exist in every one of us, in every moment of our lives and in all that we do.  As individual as we all are, faith, hope and love is just as unique to each person as Faith is to the world.  Faith is what makes tomorrow possible and yesterday meaningful, but again only with hope and love.

Faith intermingles with Hope and is held together by Love "the glue" that makes all three work.  Take out Hope and/or Love and Faith is a Merriam-Webster word used in the English language.

So, we are nowhere near a description of Faith, but we can look at lovely quotes that connect with the soul that bring us closer in certain ways - Faith being something we cannot see but only feel, like the wind caressing your cheeks or the warmth of the sun - in other words, "blind faith or belief in a feeling we cannot prove."  While that may be partly true, I believe that Faith, Hope and Love dwell together for a reason.  I believe there is good in each and every person in the world, albeit sometimes we must peel back some layers to find it and sometimes goodness is seen in the private final moments of someone's journey..I believe it is there.  I cannot prove this theory of mine - you see, it is based on Faith, Hope and Love.  Faith in mankind, enough Hope for the entire world and Love for everyone in my reach.


Faith is also found everyday in forgiveness.  You see, in forgiveness, we not only set whatever or whoever we are forgiving free, but we set ourselves free at the same time.   Free from hate, free from contempt, free from judgement.  Forgiveness, in other words, is huge.  While the definition for forgiveness is an easier word to define it is also a close cousin to Faith, Hope and Love.



What would our world look like today if these three components ruled all of our decisions?  It doesn't matter what religion you worship or do not worship, Faith, Hope and Love can be a part of each and every one of us.   World leaders would approach political decisions much differently if governed by a different beacon.  There would be no terrorist groups using violence to assert their beliefs, no need to pass concealed weapons permits, no violent crimes against mankind.  Ahhh, but that would be a perfect world and such a simple answer to such complicated questions are just not in the cards.

Powered and held together by Love, Hope and Faith empower each of us in our families, with our friends, in our communities, in our government, our schools, which makes a significant difference.  I certainly don't have all the answers, but I know that each of us has the power to have enough Hope for the entire world, and enough Love that empowers both Faith and Hope in small miracles every single day and that makes a huge difference.

Love gives you hope, courage, strength.  Hope gives you Faith.  Keep Loving, Keep Hoping.







Saturday, June 7, 2014

From The Trenches

This date was courtesy of an online dating website. After several attempts at scheduling a date because of dog sitting issues, we finally meet for dinner. He had just returned from a vacation with his dog. Just the 2 of them. Very cute, right? Or creepy, whatever. He seemed to be nice enough. While at dinner he explained how they had a lovely relaxing time (yes, him & the dog), he’s had to hire 3 dog sitters because the dog was bored of the first 2, satisfied with his job, and now looking to form the next phase of his life. I’m listening, answering his questions, engaging in conversation.
He says to me “you know I feel so comfortable with you. Like I can share anything with you.”
“Aww that’s very sweet thank you!” Right?
He leans in and says “I want to share something personal with you”.
“I am flattered. Please feel free. “
“You know I really love my dog.” Yes, I do. “I love playing with him. We love playing with each other. He really gets me through some of the loneliness I feel, sometimes.”
“Of course. That’s awesome that you have the dog in your life to help you through those times. People underestimate how much companionship, caring, love, and responsibility a dog provides. Some people treat their dogs as they would a child.”
“I’m so glad to hear you say that. So many people don’t understand that kind of feeling you get from a pet. In fact, I’d like to tell you something else.” [Leans in closer]. “I play with my dog naked.”
“WHAT?”
“Yes, I mean, the dog is naked; why shouldn’t I be? I really like the feeling of his fur on my naked body.”
I get up from the table. He says” where are you going? Are you offended by this?”
Oh, absolutely not. I just forgot that I had to play with my cat.

Saturday, March 29, 2014

Love

Once upon a time there was an island where all the feelings lived; happiness, sadness, knowledge, vanity, richness and all the others, including Love. 

One day it was announced to all of the feelings that the island was going to sink to the bottom of the ocean. So all the feelings prepared their boats to leave. Love was the only one that stayed. She wanted to preserve the island paradise until the last possible moment. When the island was almost totally under, Love decided it was time to leave. She began looking for someone to ask for help. 

Just then Richness was passing by in a grand boat. Love asked, "Richness, Can I come with you on your boat?"  Richness answered, " I'm sorry, but there is a lot of silver and gold on my boat and there would be no room for you anywhere." Love understood.

Then Love decided to ask Vanity for help who was passing in a beautiful vessel.  Love cried out, "Vanity, help me please."  "I can't help you", Vanity said, "You are all wet and will damage my beautiful boat."  Love understood.

Next, Love saw Sadness passing by. Love said, "Sadness, please let me go with you." 
Sadness answered, "Love, I'm sorry, but, I just need to be alone now."  Love understood only too well.

Then, Love saw Happiness.  Love cried out, " Happiness, please take me with you." But Happiness was so overjoyed that he didn't hear Love calling to him. Love began to cry, but understood.

Then, Love heard a voice say, "Come Love, I will take you with me." It was an elder. Love felt so blessed and overjoyed that she forgot to ask the elder his name. When they arrived on land the elder went on his way. Love realized how much she owed the elder. 

Love then found Knowledge and asked, "Who was it that helped me?" "It was Time", Knowledge answered. 

"But why did Time help me when no one else would?", Love asked. 

Knowledge smiled and with deep wisdom and sincerity, answered, "Because only Time is capable of understanding how great Love is."


Wednesday, March 26, 2014

It's Just A Bad Day, Not A Bad Life

I am still determined to be cheerful and happy, regardless of the situation I may be in, for I have learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness..or misery depends on our disposition and not upon our circumstances.

After all, aren't we all just fumbling through, one day at a time, trying to get it right 99.9% of the time?   Of course, most of us are hopeful to find a heart that's walking toward us and not away.  


To have Faith is to be sure of the things we hope for, to be certain of the things we cannot see.

As a woman/girl/female, it is hard to not define ourselves by our photograph - as a sum total, we are not our "hair" (frizzy, beautiful, highlighted, straight, curly), we are not our feet (colossally large, average or small), nor (thankfully) are we our thighs (muscular, toned or dimpled)...what I'm trying to say, is that there is much more than how we "look"...we are loving creatures with quirks, talents, passions, scarred but not flawed, and flawed by still beautiful.

So, do me a favor and choose Passion over comfort, choose magic over predictability, choose to love, choose to follow your dream, choose to awaken brilliance in ordinary moments.





Tuesday, March 18, 2014

All You Need Is Love

There’s nothing more compelling than a random act of love. It’s the little things we can do for our family, our friends and the capricious people that we encounter throughout our lives. The simple act  of doing something for someone, coupled with the element of surprise, is enough to melt someone’s heart. Showing love is beyond powerful and brings an immediate sense of joy to our hearts. Focus on giving love in the imperfections of life. Honor the cycle of love.



Monday, March 10, 2014

Destiny Is Half The Journey..The Rest Is Yours To Make

Ever hear that old (or maybe not so old) euphamism about life.. "you are either one who likes the merry-go-round or the rollercoaster in life."   The meaning here is that there are people who like the merry-go-round, it's predictable, it goes around and around, you can count on it at a certain speed, no thrills, no frills.  We need these steadfast merry-go-round people.  Then, there are the rollercoaster lovers...these people seek the thrill rides, they are fast, have dips, twirls and can scare the living pee right out of you.  The world also needs the rollercoaster type people.

I'm definitely a rollercoaster person; however, for some reason, I've been stuck on the Ferris Wheel, spinning me around until I have lost perception.  The little voice inside me has become a fairly loud whisper..."Thank you, I'll be getting off here if you don't mind."

Most things in our daily lives are so mediocre, the one thing that shouldn't be is love...that should be crazy, passionate and on fire, never mediocre.



                                                                 Mediocre




Sunday, March 9, 2014

Faltering

I’ve never been a quitter. I was born stubborn.  If you tell me I can’t do something, you’re asking for a front row seat in the “watch how it’s done show.”  That’s who I am.  How I’ve always been. I’m a fighter.  You can knock me down but you can’t beat me.  I might stumble (I stumble on a good day), I might falter, but I refuse to give up. There is something proud and resilient about me that people pick up almost instantly (most people). Something that says I refuse to be beaten.  If you look closely into my eyes, you will see this fragility that has learned self-reliance the hard way.

I’ve learned that there are no shortcuts or easy rides to anything worth while, anything that’s truly magical.  I believe in fate and destiny and the magic of the unknown because I’m a romantic. But I also believe that that’s half the journey, and from a certain point  forward - we own the path. For the way we choose to live.  I’m loyal – fiercely so. My will is incredibly strong. For most of my life I’ve been in battle with it myself. It used to be something I prided myself with but lately I’m not so sure.  I feel as if it has transcended me. Almost as if it’s risen above and beyond me. I can’t silence it nor can I seem to control its strength and its insistence to endure. 

 But it’s proving hard – accepting that goes against my nature.  It goes against who I am.  The concept of giving up… it seems weak and small...but, this time, I realize...it's not enough just to have a strong will..the stars must line up to make a connect-the-dot puzzle work out right, things I have no control over...

Thursday, March 6, 2014

Sprinkle A Little Fairy Dust On Me

She believes in love and romance. She believes her life is going to be transformed into something wonderful and exciting. She has hopes and fears, just like anyone. Sometimes, she feels frightened. Sometimes, she feels unloved. Sometimes she feels she will never gain approval from those people who are most important to her.
But she’s brave, and goodhearted, and faces her life head on. 

I believe in holding still. I believe that the secrets we hold in our hearts are our anchors, that even the unspoken between us is a measure of our every promise to the living and the dead. And all our promises, like all our hopes, move us through life with the power of an ocean liner pushing through the sea. 

Always remember,you are smart enough and beautiful enough to never be taken for granted and to never be anyone’s second best. 
At this moment, there are 6,470,818,671 people in the world. Some are running scared. Some are coming home. Some tell lies to make it through the day. Others are just now facing the truth. Some are evil men, at war with good. And some are good, struggling with evil. Six billion people in the world, six billion souls. And sometimes… all you need is one. 

There is no magic cure, no making it all go away forever. There are only small steps upward; an easier day, an unexpected laugh, a mirror that doesn’t matter anymore. 


33 Things About Giving Love That are Free

I often think, those things which we enjoy the most, truly appreciate the most (and sometimes to forget to appreciate the most) are actually free.

1.  The way you make someone feel.

2.  The moment you realize, you are not as alone as you think you are.

3.  When someone loves you at your most unlovable times.

4.  The smile on your child's face, like a moonbeam.

5.  The moment, after it's gone, and not regretting it.

6.  Affecting people without realizing it.

7.  Hope.  Hope.  Hope.

8.  Faith.  Restoring someone's Faith.

9.  Waking up to have another day and another chance to get it right.

10.  A second chance (at anything).

11.  A hug and being hugged tight.

12.  A text, phone call or message of love.

13.  Being missed by someone.

14.  That the sun comes up in the morning without fail as does the moon.

15.  Tolerance.

16.  Comfortable silences amongst those you love.

17.  Butterflies - seen or felt.

18.  Holding a hand.

19.  Trust.

20.  When someone warms your car up in below zero temps.

21.  Having the courage to think for yourself.

22.  Forgiving yourself or someone.

23. If you love until it hurts, there can be no more hurt, only love -understanding the Paradox (Mother Teresa).

24. The heat of the sun on your bare skin.

25.  Helping someone else find a piece of Joy in their life.

26.  Just being there when you are needed.

27.  The way the words "I love you Mommie" sound as they tumble off of my daughter's lips..

28.  Saying what you mean, and meaning what you say....

29.  Random acts of kindness.

30.  Not holding back.

31.  Your time.  Your time when you are busy.

32.  Listening.

33.  The sound of someone's familiar voice.


Sunday, March 2, 2014

Could It Be Your Vagus Nerve?

To start, what's a vagus nerve (pronounced like Las Vegas)?  This sinewy little nerve is pretty important and starts at the medulla (in your brain) and travels all the way down, past your chest and beyond your stomach.  The vagus nerve is responsible for literally a multitude of of our bodily functions from feeling happiness, depression to irritable bowel syndrome.

The vagus nerve is so important that many health issues can be back-tracked, at least in part, to the vagus nerve having low tone.


Wondering if what you are feeling lately is due to the vagus nerve?  It is safe to say that damage to the vagus nerve can result in a host of symptoms and here are just a few:
*  Difficulty swallowing (dysphagia)
*  Hoarseness in voice (dysphonia)
*  Epilepsy (seizures)
*  Incontinence (urinary control)
*  Irritable bowel syndrome (alternating diarrhea/constipation)
*  Arrhythmia (abnormal heart beat or rhythm)
*  Dizziness, shortness of breath
*  Gastroparesis, digestive difficulties, refllux,
*  Obesity, low insulin production, diabetes
*  Depression, anxiety, memory loss, confusion, migraine headaches

And, the vagus nerve has an impact on our conscious and subconcious feelings - such as feelings of happiness or depression.  Thinking it's your vagus nerve causing your symptoms?   Click this link for the You Tube Video.

The term "vagus" is a Latin term, meaning "wandering" because this nerve meanders and branches out throughout the body.  It is also referred to as cranial nerve X.  The vagus nerve is a MAJOR player in our body (parasympathetic nerve functions) regulating bodily functions.  When something is amiss or there is vagal nerve damage, it's like a football team without a quarterback.


For example - when you are presented with a situation that causes "fight or flight" emotions - your brain signals your body to release epinephrine (adrenaline) a stimulant to "give you strength to deal with the situation (remember stories about a mother lifting a car off of her child?  She was utilizing adrenaline).  Once the danger passes, the vagus nerve starts to take over by signaling the parasympathetic nerve system to calm the body...lower heart rate....so bodily functions such as digestion may continue.



The vagus nerve has far reaching effects on our body.   Our feelings of sexual arousal, desire, speech, swallowing, heart rate, moderating inflammation are all impacted by the proper functioning of the vagus nerve.

The Enteric Nerve System (ENS) is also impacted by the function of our vagus nerve and is so important that it is almost called our second brain.  There are some 500 million neurons in our digestive process which are impacted by our vagus nerve and enteric nerve system to aid in digestion of food.  The ENS is called a second brain because it can function even if the vagus nerve is severed.

Now that we have covered some of the bodily functions impacted by the good health of our vagus nerve, it is now felt that our feelings of happiness or depression are impacted as well by our vagus nerve.  Did you know that your gag reflex is stimulated by the vagus nerve?


Each of us varies in regards to our vagus nerve and vagal tone; however, it is felt that an individual with good vagal tone will have a better chance of good overall medical health and a sense of happiness.

While it is impossible to measure our vagal tone, if you are overweight, the vagus nerve plays a huge part in the production of insulin, and being sedentary or inactive, you may have feelings of depression due to poor vagal tone.  In addition, poor vagal tone may cause symptoms of constipation or dull the sensation of feeling full after eating a nice balanced meal causing you to overeat, gain weight and be at risk for diabetes, cardiovascular health issues, and depression (a vicious circle, indeed)!


So, here's to improving our vagal tone...how do we do that?   Researchers are just now performing studies on patients with perceived low vagal tone and having them work on increasing their mood by support systems, using loving kindness in their lives and as they began to improve their emotional well-being and taking control over outside influences that make them stressed, sad or feelings of low-self esteem, they began to experience an upward spiral and increased vagal tone.

Clearly, this shows that we can improve our vagal tone which positively impacts our physical bodies.  I think the vagus nerve is very overlooked in many individuals suffering symptoms of irritable bowel syndrome, diabetes, obesity, cardiovascular issues because of our vagus nerve.

Specialists in neurology offer implantation of a vagus nerve stimulator to treat patients with epilepsy (seizures) and were SURPRISED to note a nice side effect...while improving the vagal tone, patients experienced less depression, which in turn, made them feel better physically, allowed them to lose weight, exercise and improve cardiovascular function, control diabetes and improved memory.

How do we improve our vagal tone for overall better health and happiness?  If you are in a tough and chronic cycle of depression, this may be a very difficult nose dive to come out of.   However, improving your emotional health one step at a time is a great FIRST step in turning that nose dive into a climb and reach for the sky.

Take a few minutes each day and talk to yourself - positive thoughts, positive affirmations, letting go of the negative or putting it aside for awhile (sometimes, I spend 15 minutes in the tanner, but that's just me..and the "me time" is important).

Exercise in any form (house cleaning is considered exercise), walking, moving, is a great way to increase your vagal tone.


Due to the constant interplay between the brain and the gut, there is a huge impact in what we eat and how we feel as well as our vagal tone.  A healthy diet that includes Omega-3 fatty acids will help increase vagal tone.  The presence of symbiotic bacteria in the gut to aid in digestion will also increase vagal tone.  How many of us have heard that stress impacts irritable bowel syndrome?   ABSOLUTELY!

In short, I think we have sold our vagus nerve out when it comes to our overall health and well being.  So, if you ask me, work on feeling good, get moving, get rid of stress, because a healthy vagus nerve is going to make you feel better, aid in weight loss, improve cardiovascular function, lessen depression and the list goes on.


Want to learn more about your vagus nerve?    There are some great articles on the web...and here's to the newest craze of exercising your vagus nerve for good health!




Thursday, February 27, 2014

Love You More


I love being horribly straightforward. I love sending reckless text messages (because how reckless can a form of digitized communication be?) and telling people I love them and telling people they are absolutely magical humans and I cannot believe they really exist. I love the thought of saying, “Kiss me harder,” and “You’re a good person,” and, “You brighten my day.” I live my life as straight-forward as possible.
Because one day, I might get hit by a bus.
I could be walking down the street one day, blasting Rihanna or Fleetwood Mac, jamming so hard that I don’t see the bus coming. I could be walking with a book in my hand, reading until the very end. I could be paying total and complete attention, imagine the impact before it arrives.
And I’d really, really rather not die with some confusing statement I said sitting in the phone or the thoughts or the memory of someone I know, care about, need.
I know how it is—we all want to be mysterious. None of us want to get hurt. None of us want to look desperate. So we wait to respond to texts, phone calls, emails, Facebook messages, Tweets. So we communicate our emotions in how we end our messages (no period this time? Really gonna get them.). So we say vague, half-statements and expect people to read our minds.
But what if we died?
What if the last thing you ever texted that girl was, “I don’t know, whenever,” when she asked an important question?
Maybe it’s weird. Maybe it’s scary. Maybe it seems downright impossible to just be—to just let people know you want them, need them.    It's a very human feeling.  I'm just willing to admit to being human.
But there is nothing more beautiful than being desperate.  It's a very human feeling.  I'm just willing to admit to being human.
And there is nothing more risky than pretending not to care.
We are young and we are human and we are beautiful and we are not as in control as we think we are. We never know who needs us back. We never know the magic that can arise between ourselves and other humans.
We never know when the bus is coming, none of us do.  Live for today, like there's no tomorrow and remember to Love - it's the one thing we carry with us always and always is forever.
(So go text them back, call them back..)  

Sunday, February 23, 2014

I am and always will be- the optimist. The hoper of far-flung hopes. The dreamer of improbable dreams. 


And.. when something hurts, it makes you beautiful..the cracks around your heart let the light shine through...


Throughout your life...you'll need sunsets, road trips, airplanes and long car rides, new songs, old songs, but people more than anything.  We all need people and you may need to be that other person to someone else, a living, breathing, screaming invitation to believe in better things - everyone we meet in life becomes important for a reason, sometimes just a season, but often when you look at them and know life is better for having them in it..hang on to them.

Sometimes, I think it is so hard to depend on people..people have their own lives, problems, dreams...and at the end of the day, all you have is yourself..and.that.has.to.be.enough.


There are a thousand ways to get noticed...most are just a gamble.  The easiest way to create an impact is to do it, one person at a time, with truth, with connection and with love..what would life be like without love.


Friday, February 21, 2014

Count Me In

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1uGOZYoGMcY
Half of my love knee deep in
Hooked on a dream that is reeling me in
Oh is this how we begin?
Flowers on fire in a black and white fence

Curtains of rain all appear
Watching the skirt of the day you disappeared
Caught like a wheel in a groove
Cranking it big but it don't want to move

Count me in
Count me in
Count me in
Count me in

The water is perfectly still
Full of the thunder but waiting until
When the lightning hits the lake
You'll know how it feels to want you and wait

Count me in
Count me in
Count me in
Count me in

Count me in
Count me in
Count me in
Count me in (Repeat)